5 strategies for a balanced life
As a business and life coach, I often find myself supporting professionals whose lives are consumed by work. Not only paid work, but the complex web of work that comprises caring for children, partners and parents, navigating financial and legal matters and staying on top of general life admin. These highly competent people have a lot of value to offer, which is why they find themselves in demand in every facet of their lives. The problem is that you’re not designed to be switched on 24/7. This is a recipe for burnout.
The good news is that you can choose to lead a more balanced life simply by inviting in more moments of joy and tranquility. I really can’t overstate the power of these small moments to combat stress and anxiety, buoy you through tough times and improve your performance. With this in mind, I’d like to share some simple strategies for you to incorporate into your daily schedule to create a more balanced life. These strategies will help you to:
think more clearly
stay calm in the face of chaos
enhance your quality of sleep
boost your creative energy
improve your emotional regulation.
Without further ado, here they are!
Move
Regular movement has been proven to reduce anxiety and depression. It helps your body to release stress hormones (like adrenaline and cortisol) and offers up pleasurable ones in their place (like endorphins and oxytocin). In addition to the positive physiological effects of exercise, movement also has a powerful psychological effect. It gives you a sense of agency, which is fundamental to good mental health.
So, whether you love dancing, stretching, surfing, jogging, jumping, cycling, swimming, climbing, strolling, bowling, gardening or any other form of movement, it’s absolutely in your best interests to incorporate some into your day.
Reflection
What type of movement feels nourishing to you? When is the best time for you to engage in movement? Which activity might you need to cut down on to make time for movement?
Breathe
Broadly speaking, you can survive for three weeks without food, three days without water and three minutes without oxygen. Breath is the foundation of life. But not all breaths are equal. To downregulate your nervous system, you want to take slow, deep belly breaths with a slightly longer outbreath (compared to your inbreath), if possible. This type of breathing activates your parasympathetic nervous system, sending a message to your body that you are safe to relax. This exercise is a variation on the maxim ‘fake it til you make it’. Even though you may feel stressed to begin with, as you persist with slow, deep, mindful breaths, your body will respond as if the stressor is dissipating, leaving you with a genuine sense of calm.
There are many different ways to practice mindful breathing. Here’s one basic exercise for you to try.
Boxed breathing
Find a quiet, comfortable place to sit or lie down in. Ensure your posture is straight-backed but relaxed. Empty your lungs completely, then simply notice your breath while you follow the instructions below. You can circle through these steps continuously for 5 - 10 minutes, three times a day or whenever you feel anxiety climbing.
Slowly count to four as you inhale through your nose. Let the air fill your lungs all the way to your lower abdomen.
Hold your breath for four counts.
Slowly count to four as you exhale through your nose until your lungs are completely empty. If you are highly aroused as you begin this exercise, try exhaling through your mouth with lips pursed as if you are blowing through a straw and/or exhale for six or eight counts so that your outbreath is longer than your inbreath. As you calm down, you can revert to nose breathing if this feels comfortable.
With your breath completely exhaled, pause for four more counts.
Reflection
How can you breathe more mindfully today? Are you willing to give boxed breathing a go? Would you like to incorporate a breathing practice into your daily routine?
Earth
Have you heard of the term ‘earthing’? It refers to our ability to tap into the earth's natural energy by walking barefoot on grass, sand, soil or rock, or immersing yourself in an ocean or river. Advocates of earthing believe that the earth’s electrons transfer into and nourish your body. Regardless of whether you subscribe to this belief or not, we can all agree that spending time in nature is calming, healing and rejuvenating.
When you exit your home, office, shopping mall or other human container and enter a pleasant natural setting, you leave behind the hubbub of our modern existence. You reap the benefits of fresh air, sunlight and the slower pace of rustling leaves, flitting birds and the rhythm of tides. Not only does this calm your nervous system but it also helps you put all the tiny insults of everyday life into perspective (in contrast with the grand scheme of our universe). On those days when you cannot get outside, it’s worth taking a minute to gaze out your window. Watching the clouds drift across the sky or stars gather at night is still a moment of immersion in nature that can calm your nervous system.
Finally, if you haven’t already read it, I highly recommend Julia Baird’s book Phosphorescence for a closer look at how you can find awe, joy and deep fulfilment in nature.
Reflection
What does connecting with nature look like for you? Is there an opportunity to do this more regularly? Can you combine it with one of the other strategies offered here?
Imagine
“A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men.” – Willy Wonka
This quote from the movie adaptation of Roald Dahl’s Charlie and the Chocolate Factory perfectly captures the findings from volumes of research into cognitive fatigue. Despite the urge to push ourselves harder and harder, research shows that our attentional and executive cognitive functions have limited capacity. We aren’t designed to be sensible, productive or efficient all of the time. It’s not in our biology. Instead, we must learn to balance work with moments of free play, imagination and dreaming to recharge our batteries.
Deep down, you know this is true. And you know that success is much more than ticking off your to-do list. As Willy Wonka implies above, it’s important to take the time to simply ‘be’.
Reflection
What does success look like to you? Is it all about productivity, or is there space to imagine, play and have fun? How can you embrace this more holistic version of success today?
Connect
Human beings are social creatures. Our brains are wired that way. If you haven’t read Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind by Yoval Hoah Harari, it’s worth it for this revelation alone:
Our species, Homo Sapiens, survived because of our ability to collaborate.
How do you feel reading that? It can be confronting for highly independent people to acknowledge that interdependence is a strength. Conversely, it might come as a relief to remember that you’re part of an ecosystem and you don’t need to run this race alone.
If you’re currently living with high levels of anxiety (or other distressing emotions), perhaps it’s time to reach out. Connect with a trusted friend. Speak with a therapist, coach or other experienced professional. Get the support you need to break out of your downward spiral and flow towards a more balanced life.
Reflection
Who do you trust to support you in tough times? Would might your life look like if you had more support? What would be a comfortable way to request this?
Next steps
Research shows that regular practice of ‘balancing strategies’ has a cumulative soothing effect on your nervous system, so perhaps you’d like to choose one strategy from this list to start experimenting with over the next few weeks. After all, learning is one thing and application another. Which one of the suggestions above looks most inviting to you?
If you would like support to explore these strategies in more detail or to create a more balanced life, get in touch. I’ve been working with passionate leaders, business owners and entrepreneurs like you for over 20 years and it would be my pleasure to support you on your journey to a more balanced and fulfilling life. You can learn more on my business, life and leadership coaching pages.
Wishing you a wonderful day!
Rebecca